Leading a company in which I am the only woman might not be a big deal for most, but it is for me. Gender issues are present in my daily life. This post is just a thought and hope I have.
Some years
back I entered an IEEE mentoring program for women. I started talking to this
lady in the US that worked in IT. I asked her about her experience, how she
dealt with it all. She didn't understood my questions, she said she went into
college and then marry some engineer and all was great in her white picket
fence house. What was I talking about? I left the program really fast. Women
engineers don't struggle much in the US.
But, I don't
know any other women that lead teams in masculine environments. Here in
Colombia, women in high positions always hide (or are force to be behind) some
man. I really don't have a role model, and sometimes don't know how to get by.
What I do,
is pose as a man most of the time. Sometimes I am not so good at it, and my
feelings show. I get disappointed and sad, instead of angry when things go
wrong and things like that.
I hope that
age will help me find balance, so I don´t have to deny my initial instincts, act
according to my true feelings and still be able to lead successfully my team. I now think I have to give up to much to be where I am.
Rafa, MSc, ingeniero agrónomo -- María, I think I know what you are talking about. According to Allan and Barbara Pease (from their book "Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps") women with superior spatial abilities (that includes yourself, most women engineers, women bus and truck drivers, women airplane pilots, etc) are just an exceptional 15 to 20% of all women. And because these "minority" women have usually both outstanding language and spatial abilities, they are plainly more intelligent than most men.
ResponderEliminarAs woman and boss, you have to understand that you are a potential "threat" to many a man's pride. As Barbara and Allan say, we cannot expect to change in just 100 years a biological brain evolution that took hundreds of thousands of years.
Most men have the brain of hunters. Most women have the brain of communicators, and a good communicator is at the base of any successful group of people. A group can be a family, but it can also be a company.
If you feel alone when acting as a leader, it might be because women are by nature much more social than men (remember that men are hunters, and that often means an urge to rely on oneself). However, you María, as "minority" woman, might feel both an urge to rely on yourself (spatial abilities) and to communicate (language abilities), and that can lead to contradictory feelings.
You have to be tough at times if you are the leader of the pack, but your inner self as communicative woman tells you that you need the approval of others as well. However, one can't have it all at a time.
Many women leaders opt for exerting a "soft" power, making use of their superior communicative skills. That is, instead of treating their employees as plain subordinates, such a woman may choose to exert less control in exchange for greater responsibility, more flexibility (for instance, in working hours) in exchange for greater motivation and involvement.
This new focus often (not always) can foster a more loyal attitude from the employees.
So I think that being a woman, a woman leader, can also be an advantage nowadays. Just reproducing the male models of authoritative leadership is no guarantee of success. Not in the 21st century.
As leader, organizational skills are important, but - and especially for less intuitive men leaders - there are nowadays other communication tools that can help a manager enormously. I am talking about Non-Verbal Communication (e.g., "Body Language", a book by the beforementioned Barbara and Allan Pease) and Face Reading ( in particular: "Amazing Face Reading", by Mac Fulfer).
Most women are intuitive by nature. But books such as these two, can offer a solid basement to intuition. As Mac Fulfer says, to learn face reading is like learning a completly new language. Spotting stress, high-probability of deceit, innate inadequacy for a certain job,...etc. If you get a chance, you might want to take a look (www.amazingfacereading.com)
Good luck. And don't worry, you are certainly a better leader than you think.