Leading a company in which I am the only woman might not be a big deal for most, but it is for me. Gender issues are present in my daily life. This post is just a thought and hope I have.
Some years
back I entered an IEEE mentoring program for women. I started talking to this
lady in the US that worked in IT. I asked her about her experience, how she
dealt with it all. She didn't understood my questions, she said she went into
college and then marry some engineer and all was great in her white picket
fence house. What was I talking about? I left the program really fast. Women
engineers don't struggle much in the US.
But, I don't
know any other women that lead teams in masculine environments. Here in
Colombia, women in high positions always hide (or are force to be behind) some
man. I really don't have a role model, and sometimes don't know how to get by.
What I do,
is pose as a man most of the time. Sometimes I am not so good at it, and my
feelings show. I get disappointed and sad, instead of angry when things go
wrong and things like that.
I hope that
age will help me find balance, so I don´t have to deny my initial instincts, act
according to my true feelings and still be able to lead successfully my team. I now think I have to give up to much to be where I am.
